Dating moving too quickly
You see, my beautiful friend, this guy knows all the moves, all the right things to say and do because he’s practiced this more than a few times.He may say he wants a relationship and a commitment, he may see he’s just never met the right woman before, he may say he wants exactly what you want, but the reality is, he hasn't figured out what he needs to do to make this happen, and his own insecurities give him no motivation to do anything different.You may crave that already within the first month of seeing somebody, but you may think it’s too soon to act on it.
If the guy is showing the same signs—if he already wants to introduce you to his best friends, read you essays he wrote in high school, show you his favorite spots in town that he goes alone to think—don’t hold the same info back from him.I trusted how I felt and how he felt and what I hoped we could be.I remember it like the best spring break ever — a fun experience that had an end date and maybe got a little too intense, but at least I don't have any regrets about it.How is it that he can treat us like such a princess, going almost overboard with flowers and gifts and romantic gestures, and then just disappear from our lives as soon as we’re completely smitten and ready to say I do? It’s at that point that everything starts changing.For reasons that have everything to do with him, and nothing to do with you, this is the MO of the guy who we have the hardest time understanding.Thinking there's some invisible textbook we all have to follow when it comes to love, and if we don't follow it, the relationship is doomed, is so limiting and potentially even unhealthier than rushing into it, when rushing into it feels good for both people. One of our readers wrote to me last week saying "I have a friend who recently met a man who is going absolutely overboard with professing his love (after 2 dates) and giving her gifts.It's much more common that the intense burning flame quickly turns into a flame-out.I've lived through it myself many times, and I've heard too many similar stories to count. It’s the chase, the conquest, the prize – this is what it’s all about to him until he knows he's got you and suddenly he realizes on some level that this has become all too real and now it’s his turn to deliver on his promises and make a commitment.If you went on a vacation to a remote island that looked like, say, this for example: Why is this beach so gorgeous? I couldn't have possibly thought this beach was so wonderful immediately.If the beach were really and truly great, I would've thought the beach was kind of meh for the first few months and then eventually I'd realize it was the most gorgeous beach I'd ever seen.